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Monday, March 13, 2017

Good morning crew,

Winter's not over yet. After weeks of irregular weather with temperatures whizzing up and down between the 20s and the 60s, winter decided to give us a farewell snowstorm. It started early this morning and it's still coming down. They are forecasting up to 9 inches by tomorrow.

I guess winter wasn't about to go out without a fight. He just squeezed it in, too. Next week is spring.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"This week, Wisconsin is hosting the U.S. Cheese Championship. Once again, the winner is expected to be 'Heart Disease.'" -Conan O'Brien

***

"According to a new study, cats may have more potential than dogs to sniff out bombs. They just won't bother to tell you." -Seth Meyers

***

"The Centers for Disease Control reminds you, still the best way to avoid contracting an STD is to get really into Dungeons and Dragons in high school." -Jimmy Kimmel

***

During the banquet celebrating their 25th wedding anniversary, Tom was asked to give his friends a brief account of the benefits of a marriage of such long duration. "Tell us Tom, just what is it you have learned from all those wonderful years with your wife?" an anonymous voice yelled from the back of the room.

Tom responded, "Well, I've learned that marriage is the best teacher of all. It teaches you loyalty, forbearance, self-restraint, meekness, forgiveness -- and a great many other qualities you wouldn't need if you had stayed single."




*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*

For the first few months of her co-op job for the state of Georgia, my sister had nothing to do, so she surfed the Web or did crossword puzzles. One day she expressed her boredom to a co-worker.

"I know," she complained. "Everyone thinks state workers have it easy. But there's only so much you can pretend you're doing."