MOUTHPIECE - January 3, 2017
It's a new year! I'm ready for it... I think. I'm not sure. Maybe? Well, I'm ready to play the Tetrom Game, learn 18 Surprising Things That Celebrities Believe, and try to keep some New Year Resolutions for Pets. A lot of good stuff in here.
It's gonna be a great year!
P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click GopherArchives
[m] q u o t e s . o f . t h e . d a y
"TV is chewing gum for the eyes."
--Frank Lloyd Wright
"They used to photograph Shirley Temple through gauze. They should photograph me through linoleum."
"There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past."
[m] What's On the Web?
This game is a puzzle builder like Tetris, but with a wist! Build platforms to reach your goal.
Visit: Tetrom Game
18 Surprising Things That Celebrities Believe
From Cracked.com: You know that good old internet adage "Once you see it"? Well the same pretty much applies here. Because we all have certain images in our heads about celebrities, and once you read these, you'll never be able to see them that same way again. For example...
Visit: 18 Surprising Things That Celebrities Believe
[m] b i t s . n . b o b s
*-- New Year Resolutions for Pets --*
15. I will not eat other animals' poop.
14. I will not lick my human's face after eating animal poop.
13. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table.
12. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.
11. I will no longer be beholden to the sound of the can opener.
10. Cats: Circulate a petition that sleeping become a juried competition in major animal shows.
9. Come to understand that cats are from Venus; dogs are from Mars.
8. Take time from busy schedule to stop and smell the behinds.
7. Hamster: Don't let them figure out I'm just a rat on steroids, or they'll flush me!
6. Get a bite in on that freak who gives me that shot every year.
5. Grow opposable thumb; break into pantry; decide for MYSELF how much food is *too* much.
4. Cats: Use new living room sofa as scratching post.
3. January 1st: Kill the sock! Must kill the sock! January 2nd - December 31: Re-live victory over the sock.
2. The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff.
AND the Number 1 New Year's Resolutions Made by Pets...
1. I will NOT chase the stick until I see it LEAVE THE IDIOT'S HAND
Missed an Issue? Visit the Mouthpiece Archives