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MOUTHPIECE - July 12, 2016

Good Afternoon,


I thought today would be a good day for a joke. I'm all about the jokes lately.

Patient: "Doctor, Doctor, I think I am a dog."

Doctor: "Lie down on the couch."

Patient: "I can't. I'm not allowed on the furniture."

It feels good to laugh, doesn't it? Have a good week.

Mouthing Off,
Carl


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[m] q u o t e s . o f . t h e . d a y

"A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both."
--Dwight D. Eisenhower

"The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is at all comprehensible."
--Albert Einstein

"Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please."
--Mark Twain


[m] What's On the Web?

The 16 Worst Songs To Reach Number One

I know you can only hear them, but these songs stink. I
mean they stink bad! Trust me. Check out the 16 worst
songs to reach numero uno.

Visit: The 16 Worst Songs To Reach Number One


10 Awesome Accidental Discoveries

From Popular Mechanics: As Plato said, "science is nothing
but perception," and these 10 accidental acts of discovery
embody the sentiment. Of course, it helps to be a leading
scientist in the field-devoting your life to the pursuit
of one cure, invention, or innovation-but a little luck
goes a long way, too.

Visit: 10 Awesome Accidental Discoveries




[m] b i t s . n . b o b s

*-- What Do Blondes Drink? --*

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went into a bar and ordered their drinks from the bartender.

Brunette: "I'll have a B and C."

Bartender: "What is a B and C?"

Brunette: "Bourbon and Coke."

Redhead: "And, I'll have a G and T."

Bartender: "What's a G and T?"

Redhead: "Gin and tonic."

Blonde: "I'll have a 15."

Bartender: "What's a 15?"

Blonde: "7 and 7"

***

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