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::::::: STOCKING STUFFER DEALS ::::::::::
Great Items That Are Fun & Won't Cost You Much
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WIRELESS HEADPHONES
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TV & Store Price: $14.99
OUR PRICE: $3.99

These Wireless Headphones With Built-In FM Radio allow you
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The manufacturer says you can use these for up to 30 feet
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They're Easy To Use... The transmitter quickly connects to
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FIVE (5) FUNCTIONS IN ONE:
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- Wired Audio Connection

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Dec. 8, 2009

HUSBAND BUILDS VERBAL WALLS BETWEEN WIFE AND HER FRIENDS

DEAR ABBY: I have a good friend whose husband is isolating
her from family and friends. He's a counselor, and he uses
his training as a psychologist to convince her that none of
her friends are to be trusted. He twists anything we do or
say to keep her at a distance from us.

He tells her she's a horrible mother and a terrible person
in general, and she believes him. I think she has been brain-
washed.

He also hits on other women regularly, myself included. When
I tried to tell my friend what he did, she refused to believe
me because he already told her his version of the story and
made it look like it was my fault.

Is there any way to help a woman who is being held mentally
captive by her husband?
-- DISTRAUGHT FRIEND

DEAR DISTRAUGHT: One way to begin would be to approach her
as a group and tell her you are all concerned and that you
care about her. Tell her often that you are there for her
and always will be, and that you know she's a terrific per-
son and a wonderful, caring parent. Point out that only two
people in the world think otherwise, and that's her husband
and her. And repeat that you're afraid she's being verbally
and emotionally abused until she finally hears you.


DEAR ABBY: I'm a 43-year-old woman who has never been
married. My boyfriend, "Phil" -- with whom I share a wonder-
ful relationship -- has been divorced three times and has
made it clear he does not want to marry again.

We're in the process of buying a home together, and I cannot
let go of the hope that one day we'll live in it as husband
and wife. It has always been my dream to find that one
"right" person and settle down. In my eyes, Phil is that
special person. I feel cheated that because of his failed
marriages my hopes and dreams don't matter.

Phil loves me and is good to me, but I have mixed emotions.
I feel that having shared an exclusive relationship for two
years and the fact that we are now buying a house together
means we should be married. Must I accept the relationship
we have?
-- DREAM LOVER IN MINNESOTA

DEAR DREAM LOVER: No. What you must accept is that your dream
and Phil's are not the same. You yearn for commitment, some-
thing which from his track record it appears Phil has trouble
with.

If marriage is what you really want, you're betting on the
wrong horse, and before investing in something as expensive
as a home, I urge you to discuss this significant financial
commitment with an attorney to ensure that your interests
are fully protected.

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DEAR ABBY: Our son lived with his girlfriend for several
years. They had a beautiful daughter together but split up
a year and a half later. His ex-girlfriend now lives with
another man, and they have a new baby girl. They'll probably
get married.

Our granddaughter is now 5 and we pick her up, take her
places and do things with her. We also buy her the usual
gifts for her birthday and holidays. We travel frequently
and bring her souvenirs from our travels.

Now that she has a baby sister, are we obligated to do the
same for her? Or should we continue doing for our grand-
daughter only? What is the proper thing here?
-- HELP NEEDED IN ALABAMA

DEAR HELP NEEDED: Put yourself in the position of the
younger sister and imagine how she will feel when she's
older and she's left behind or forgotten. If you exclude
her completely, I guarantee it will cause resentment and
division between the girls, so open your heart. Be inclus-
ive and generous -- not only for her sake, but also for your
granddaughter's.



For everything you need to know about wedding planning,
order "How to Have a Lovely Wedding." Send a business-sized,
self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $6
(U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby -- Wedding Booklet, P.O. Box
447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in the
price.)

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as
Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline
Phillips. Write Dear Abby at
T="_new" class="abbylink">www.DearAbby.com
or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.