Subscribe to GOPHER UPDATES
 
Subscribe to DEAL OF THE DAY
 


Classic Laff-a-Day - March 2, 2010
http://laffaday.gophercentral.com
------------------------------------------------------------

Greetings Laff Lovers,

Today is Washington's birthday (observed, anyway), that's
former U.S. president and father of our country George
Washington, not Freddy "Boom-Boom" Washington from Welcome
Back Kotter.

Washington is famous for three things, chopping down his
father's cherry tree, wearing wooden teeth and defeating the
British in the war of independence...all of which are not
100 percent historically accurate.

The story about chopping down the cherry tree is almost
certainly made up, and Washington wore false teeth made
from bone, not wood.

As for defeating the British, they weren't so much defeated
as they just gave up. Commanding a small, ill-equipped,
unpaid and largely amateur army, Washington performed
brilliantly with what he had but still managed to get his
ass kicked all over New England by the larger, better
equipped and better trained Brits.

His greatest success was in keeping the continental army from
completely disintegrating. His greatest victory came at the
Battle of Yorktown which was supported by the French navy and
3,000 professional French soldiers.

Not that I'm belittling Washington. The United States would
not have been born if it weren't for him, I just like to get
all the facts straight!

Historically,

TZ

mailto:tz@gophercentral.com



Karada Cleansing/Detox Foot Pads

Retail Price: $19.99
DEAL PRICE: $9.99 (for package of 10)

Over 18 million foot patches are sold every month in Asia,
see what they can do for you. Japanese Detox Foot Patches
are all the rage and now you can get them without paying
an outrageous price... get them for 1/2 price while you can.

The Karada Cleansing Foot Pads are made from bamboo vinegar,
an ingredient Japanese scientists have proven has the ability
to draw out toxins from the body.

These foot patches are said to stimulate nerve endings on the
bottom of your feet which in turn stimulate the secretion of
lymph fluid. Using the Karada Foot Pads you have the ability
to pull out the impurities in your body by focusing on the
acupressure points in your feet. Best of all, they are so
easy to use.

Features:
- Helps cleanse your body by drawing-out chemicals & toxins.
- Includes 10 Patches
- 100% All-Natural formula made with real wood & bamboo vinegar.
- Easy-to-use individual wrapped packs

Get a 10-Pk for the low price. Save even more and get two
packages (20 pads in total) for $15.98. Visit:
http://pd.gophercentral.com/u/3892/c/120/a/500



Two guys talking in a bar: "I can't break my wife of the
habit of staying up until 5 in the morning."

"What is she doing 'til 5 a.m.?" the pal asked.

"Waiting for me to get home."



A guy goes up to a girl in a bar and says, "You want to play
'Magic'?"

She says, "What's that?"

He says, "We go to my house and make love, and then you disappear."=



Need a job? Visit Monster.com
http://www.evtv1.com/evtv1_newads.aspx?u=14722&c=370&a=100226


An applicant for a job with the federal government was filling
out the application form. He came to this question: "Do you
favor the overthrow of the United States government by force,
subversion, or violence?" Thinking it was a multiple-choice
question, he checked "violence."



TIRED NO MORE...

Store Price: $24.99
INTRODUCTORY PRICE: $2.99

"Studies show Ginseng is effective in treating
circulation problems, fatigue, lack of energy,
stress and anxiety."

Throughout ancient history, Ginseng has been praised for its
exceptional nutrition value. Modern nutrition researchers
also regard Ginseng as a valuable herb because of its naturally-
proportioned wealth of vitamins, minerals, enzymes, & co-enzymes.

We're SO SURE that our "Ginseng Energy" will help you, we're
practically giving it away. For a fraction of the store
price you can get 60 pills to see for yourself what the
'miracle of Ginseng' can do for you. Grab a bottle by visiting
(Sorry there is a limit of five (5) bottles per order):
http://pd.gophercentral.com/u/3292/c/120/a/500



A sweet, beautiful young would-be starlet comes to Hollywood
to seek her fortune. At her first power cocktail party she
goes to the host and asks him, "Who's the most powerful man
in the room?"

"That would be Bob, over there by the caviar," he says.

The young woman walks over to Bob and says, "Excuse me, Bob,
would you mind stepping back behind this column? I'd like to
talk to you."

Bob and the girl step behind the column and she says, "Bob,
I'm gonna unzip your fly, take out your penis and give you
the best blowjob you ever had!"

Bob smiles slightly and says, "Well, okay, but what's in it
for me?"


P.S. You can discuss this issue or any other topic in the
new Classic Laffaday forum. Check it out here...

http://laffaday.gophercentral.com


************************************************************

YOUR VIDEO SNACK BAR
Top Viewed Videos...

1. Marine Silent Marching
http://c.gophercentral.com/rO13

2. Man's Best Friend
http://c.gophercentral.com/2TYQ

3. Celebrities: Before and After Make-Up
http://c.gophercentral.com/49A3

4. Amos N´ Andy - In the IRS Office
http://c.gophercentral.com/iZUQ

5. The Muppets
http://c.gophercentral.com/sVqB

6. The Stones
http://c.gophercentral.com/XLr8