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Oct. 16, 2009

DEJECTED MOTHER FRETS THAT SON IS FORGOTTEN OVERSEAS

DEAR ABBY: Before my son deployed to Afghanistan two months
ago, his grandma, aunts and cousins all promised to send
cards, letters and care packages.

So far, not one of them has stepped up to the plate. I am so
frustrated I felt like crying as I was preparing a care
package with his favorite cookies.

Abby, why do people make promises they can't keep?
-- BROKENHEARTED MILITARY MOM

DEAR MILITARY MOM: The promises are often made with the best
intentions -- and then the promiser becomes distracted, di-
verted, forgetful. In most cases, no one means to be hurtful.

Because these forgetful folks are family members, my advice
is to remind them of what a morale booster it would be for
your son to hear from them. Suggest items he might need, and
offer to send them along with YOUR next care package.


DEAR ABBY: My co-worker has the same last name as a deceased
porn star. We work in customer service together, and she gets
many suggestive comments and laughs from our male customers.
She would like to respond with a witty comeback without being
offensive or jeopardizing her job. Any suggestions?
-- FRIEND OF LOVELACE

DEAR FRIEND: While it may be tempting for your co-worker to
respond with a witty comeback, she should play it smart and
resist the urge to acknowledge her male customers' attempts
at humor. Once she starts "getting cute," it will only en-
courage more of the same.

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DEAR ABBY: I am a directory assistance operator who would
like to pass on some advice to our callers:

We do NOT know your Aunt Martha who lives behind the Kmart
store, and we no longer sit in the back room at a switch-
board at the local drugstore. We may not even be located in
the state you are calling.

When you dial directory assistance, please be prepared to
provide the city, state and the first and last names of the
person whose number you need, or the complete name of the
business. A street name helps for common names.

Please have your pencil and paper ready to write down the
number. We cannot wait five minutes while you hunt through
drawers or glove compartments, or worse, put the phone down
to look in another room. Our contract with your phone company
usually requires that we finish each call within a short
time, and we can lose that contract if we cannot comply.

And please, do not swear at us or call us names if we are un-
able to help you. Our information is only as good as what's
provided by your local carrier to our database. We really do
try our best to help you.

Thanks, Abby, for helping spread this message on behalf of
thousands of hardworking operators.
-- SMILING INTO THE SPEAKER

DEAR SMILING: I'm pleased to pass along your commonsense
suggestions. Because so much of the telephone information
system has become automated, callers do need to have pencils
handy and give clear information when requesting a number.
And when someone is lucky enough to actually be connected to
a living, breathing, flesh-and-blood human being (yes!),
abusing the person is not only unproductive, it could get you
disconnected.



Abby shares more than 100 of her favorite recipes in two
booklets: "Abby's Favorite Recipes" and "More Favorite
Recipes by Dear Abby." Send a business-size, self-addressed
envelope, plus check or money order for $12 (U.S. funds)

to: Dear Abby -- Cookbooklet Set, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris,
IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in price.)

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as
Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline
Phillips. Write Dear Abby at
T="_new" class="abbylink">www.DearAbby.com
or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.