Subscribe to THE DAILY GROANER
 
Subscribe to DEAL OF THE DAY
 



THE DAILY GROANER - Wednesday, Sept. 11th 2013

Good Morning Groanies,


I was in a bad mood this morning. I couldn't tell you why I felt this way, but...

I didn't want my bad mood to ruin my day so I started to thumb through the dictionary, as I often do when I get a little grumpy. I took a few minutes to look in my paperback word directory and search for a term, a word that will make me laugh and bring a smile to my mug.

Today, the word that I ran across is... Burgled. It's just a funny sounding word. Go ahead, say it aloud. You see? Funny stuff.

Well, I feel much better. I hope this mood-altering secret of mine will come in handy for you during the course of your workday or any other time you need it.

I'm glad we did this.

Groaningly yours,
Steve


Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- I Lost My Wife --*

The man approached a very beautiful woman in a large supermarket and asked, "You know, I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"

"Why?" she asks.

"Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman, my wife appears out of nowhere."


*-- A Funeral With Heart --*

A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral. A huge heart covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service.

Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever.

At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter. When all eyes stared at him, he said, "I'm sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral... I'm a gynecologist."


*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

A: Because he wanted sweet dreams.


Q: What's the best parting gift?

A: A comb.

***

Missed an Issue? Visit the Daily Groaner Archives