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THE DAILY GROANER - July 20, 2015
Good Morning Groanies,
I went to an "All-You-Can-Eat" Buffet place and I discovered the term "All-You-Can-Eat" harshly misrepresents the activity permitted at this hungry extinguishing establishment.
This chew-atorium claims that it's "All-You-Can-Eat" Buffet is for one specific meal-time. So now I can't spend all day in this fine dining location and only pay for one meal and then eat four to six meals at my leisure.
From now on I guess I'll just have to wear my over-sized coat and pants when I go there. The rolls alone are worth it. Oh, and I can't forget the ziploc bags to hold my procured gravy. Hmmmm, procured gravy. Who's hungry?
Groaningly yours,
Steve
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*-- What Happened To Her Ears? --*
A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor. The doctor asked her what had happened to her ears?
"I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang - but instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear."
"Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But, what happened to your other ear?"
"The son-of-a-bitch called back!"
*-- Driving Without A Tail Light --*
"How long have you been driving without a tail light?" asked the policeman after pulling over a motorist.
The driver jumped out, ran to the rear of his car, and gave a long, painful groan. He seemed so upset that the cop was moved to ease up on him a bit.
"Come on, now," he said, "you don't have to take it so hard. It isn't that serious."
"It isn't?" cried the motorist. "Then you know what happened to my boat and trailer?"
*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
A: Rough! Rough!
Q: What did Neptune say to Saturn?
A: Give me a ring sometime!
***
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