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THE DAILY GROANER - Monday, April 19th 2010

Good Morning Groanies,

I haven't done this bit in a while. It's long overdue.
Here's a list of... What I Learned Last Week!

1. Pizza Bagels Rule!

2. Laugh Tracks Are Unnecessary

3. Nothing Beats A Burger on the Grill

4. Vending Machines are Robotic Con-Men

5. I've mastered the use of a knife and fork.

I'm always learning. It's an on going thing.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

Email Steve: mailto:groaner@gophercentral.com

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A husband had just finished reading a new book entitled,
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He stormed to his wife in the kitchen and announced, 'From
now on, you need to know that I am the man of this house
and my word is Law. You will prepare me a gourmet meal
tonight, and when I'm finished eating my meal, you will
serve me a sumptuous dessert. After dinner, you are going
to go upstairs with me and we will have the kind of sex
that I want. Afterward, you are going to draw me a bath
so I can relax. You will wash my back and towel me dry and
bring me my robe. Then, you will massage my feet and hands.
Then tomorrow, guess who's going to dress me and comb my
hair?'

The wife replied, 'The damn funeral director would be my
first guess.'


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Q: Why did the student eat his homework?

A: The teacher told him it was a piece of cake.


Q: What has ears but can't hear a thing?

A: A cornfield.

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