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THE DAILY GROANER - February 3, 2016

Good Morning Groanies,


Since I was a kid I've been known to talk in my sleep and the other night I was gabbing again... so I was told.

Stacy said she woke up and heard me making noises. She thought that I was talking to her. She asked me if I was okay, but I didn't answer. She asked again, this time a bit louder, "Are you okay?"

Then, out of the blue, I said, "I'm a fan of nachos and harmonicas. But you can keep the pleated pants."

I don't know what I was dreaming about or thinking about, or even if I was dreaming or thinking, you never can tell with me, but at least I didn't say something like, "I like the way angora feels against my skin...", or " the neighbor's baby offered me a cigarette...", or "the toaster still owes me 12 bucks", and so on.

Hey, talk is cheap. And, right now, it's all I can afford.

Groaningly yours,
Steve


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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: How do you get an 80 year old lady to use the F-word?

A: Have another 80 year old lady yell Bingo!

(Joke courtesy of Brian)

Q: Who do you call when your calculator dies?

A: The mathemortician.


*-- Switching Channels --*

I was checking into a motel and asked the night clerk if the porn channel was disabled.

She said, "No. It's regular porn you sick bastard."

(Joke courtesy of Brian)


*-- More Q and A Quickies --*

Q: What goes up when the rain comes down?

A: An umbrella.


Q: What do you call a surgeon with eight arms?

A: A doctopus!

***

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