> > > Lose Weight With APPLE CIDER VINEGAR < < <
The #1 ALL NATURAL Diet Product - $2.99 A Bottle
http://pd.gophercentral.com/r/186/a/585/l/ti4p52
------------------------------------------------------------
THE DAILY GROANER - Friday, March 12th 2010

Good Morning Groanies,

The snow has MELTED!!! I am so excited. I really missed
the grass. The bright green color. The smell of fresh cut
grass. It's wonderful. It reminds me of fun summers in the
backyard.

Wait a minute. With the snow melting and the grass exposed
that can mean only one thing: Spring is coming! And with
that, I'm going to have to start cutting the grass again.
Oh, crap!

I need snow. Lots Of SNOW!!! Let It SNOW! SNOW!

Groaningly yours,
Steve

Email Steve: mailto:groaner@gophercentral.com

Now You Can Follow the Daily Groaner on Twitter:
http://twitter.com/DailyGroaner

Looking for a Laugh? You'll find them on EVTV1.com:
http://www.evtv1.com/humor.aspx

Comment at the NEW Daily Groaner Forum:
http://groaner.gophercentral.com/

------------------------------------------------------------
Microfiber Pet Drying Mitts
Never Struggle To Dry Your Wet Pet Again...

Retail Price: $9.99
DEAL PRICE: $7.99
Get two for: $11.98

The Microfiber material is great for absorbing more dirt,
oil and water than other types of gloves. Absorbs up to
five times its weight. Naturally attracts and holds loose
hair and dander. Great to keep multiples on hand.

Just slip them on and pet your wet pet and dry them
instantly. Great after bath, walks in the rain... anytime!

Keep one handy in the home, car, boat, camper or anywhere
dogs will track in dirt.

FEATURES:
- Includes 2 Drying Mitts (Length 11", Width 8")
- Made of washable poly/nylon microfiber fabric.
- Absorbing up to five (5) times it's Weight in Water!
- Has sewn in finger slots to aid in gripping & massaging.
- One size fits all.
- Machine Wash; Tumble Dry

Grab a pair of Pet Drying Mitts for $7.99 or save an
additional $4.00 and get two pairs for $11.98.
http://pd.gophercentral.com/u/2443/c/120/a/585
------------------------------------------------------------


A policeman pulled a female driver over and asked to see
her license. After looking it over, he said to her, "Lady,
it stipulates here on your license that you should be
wearing glasses."

"Well, I have contacts," the woman replied.

"Look lady, I don't care who you know," snapped the
officer. "You're getting a ticket!"


------------------------------------------------------------
*** By Far The BEST Hands Free Light **

Mini Tactical Ear Light with White LED
Focus light wherever you turn your head...

List Price: $14.99
DEAL PRICE: $4.99
Get two for $7.98

This lightweight LED light has no wires to fumble with
and is a relief from awkward book lights that must be
balanced on the page or on a nearby desk. The LED shines
wherever you look, for complete hands-free convenience
when reading in bed or on a plane.

FEATURES:
- Lightweight and comfortable
- It's glare free and doesn't get hot.
- Fits comfortably & easily around the Right or Left ear.
- Uses two button cell batteries (INCLUDED)
- LED bulb will last up to 100,000 hours
- Three Settings: Slow Blink, Fast Blink & Constant Light
- Bluetooth Style

Easy to attach to one ear, leaving hands free for reading,
computing, writing, etc. in the dark. Makes a Great Gift!
Get one for $4.99 or two for $7.99, visit:
http://pd.gophercentral.com/u/14457/c/120/a/585
------------------------------------------------------------

Q: What do you call six stones with electric guitars?

A: A rock group.


Q: Why did the polar bears go to the South Pole?

A: To visit their Aunt Arctica!

------------------------------------------------------------
YOUR VIDEO SNACK BAR
Top Viewed Videos...

1. Marine Silent Marching
http://c.gophercentral.com/rO13

2. Man's Best Friend
http://c.gophercentral.com/2TYQ

3. Celebrities: Before and After Make-Up
http://c.gophercentral.com/49A3

4. Amos N´ Andy - In the IRS Office
http://c.gophercentral.com/iZUQ

5. The Muppets
http://c.gophercentral.com/sVqB

6. The Stones
http://c.gophercentral.com/XLr8


------------------------------------------------------------
Follow Your Favorite GopherCentral Publications on Twitter:
http://www.gophertweets.com/ More Coming Soon!

View The Daily Groaner Archives for your favorite jokes!
http://groaner.gophercentral.com/
------------------------------------------------------------