Travel Ready 37 pc First Aid Kit - Perfect For On The Go!
http://pd.gophercentral.com/u/1088/c/186/a/585
------------------------------------------------------------
THE DAILY GROANER - Wednesday, July 14th 2010
Good Morning Groanies,
I was at the store the other day and I purchased a t-shirt.
The aforementioned t-shirt was for me as well as a hodge
podge of products that would definitely help make my life
that much easier. Things like alcohol swabs, jumbo soft
pretzels, and some hair-care products.
Now, the t-shirt was a clearance item that I had wanted to
purchase for some time and final I figure that if I didn't
purchase it today that it would be gone the very next time
I found myself trotting around this particular store.
When I went to purchase my various items I made my way to
the Express Lane hoping to get everything scanned and paid
for in record time... but, that wasn't the case on this
day.
The cashier scanned all my items rather quickly, until she
got to the t-shirt. She picked up the shirt and searched
for the price tag and that's when it happened. She looked
at me and said, "Oh, this is a nice shirt. Is this shirt
for you or do you need a gift receipt? What size is this
shirt? It doesn't look like an extra-large. Do you think
this looks like an extra-large? Is it 100% cotton? It
feels like it. I bet you'll have to dry this shirt on the
tumble dry low cycle. Do you think I'd look good in this
shirt? Are there more of these shirts on display? Do they
come in different colors?..."
Out of respect for you, the reader, I'll stop there. This
crazy woman went on with this non-stop rambling mess for
at least three whole minutes. It was like being on a bad
blind date with a woman that won't shut up, not even to
take a breath.
She eventually stopped talking when I said, "Please, for
the love of all that is holy and sacred, I really need to
get back to work. Can you please scan this shirt so I can
get out of here?" She did, just as pleased as punch, and
then I was on my way.
As I walked away I heard her start talking to the unlucky
shopper that was standing behind me in line. "Hey, is this
a good brand of toothpaste? Is it really minty? Does it
really whiten your teeth like it says?..."
And that was the guys very first item. The poor bastard.
Groaningly yours,
Steve
Email Steve: mailto:groaner@gophercentral.com
Now You Can Follow the Daily Groaner on Twitter:
http://twitter.com/DailyGroaner
Looking for a Laugh? You'll find them on EVTV1.com:
http://www.evtv1.com/humor.aspx
------------------------------------------------------------
In a courtroom, a purse-snatcher is on trial and the victim
is stating what happened.
She says, "Yes, that is him. I saw him clear as day. I'd
remember his face anywhere."
At which point, the defendant bursts out, "You couldn't
see my face, lady. I was wearing a mask!"
------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why are cakes similar to baseball teams?
A: They both need good batters!
Q: What did the rope say after it got tangled?
A: Oh, no, knot again!
------------------------------------------------------------
Follow Your Favorite GopherCentral Publications on Twitter:
http://www.gophertweets.com/ More Coming Soon!
------------------------------------------------------------