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THE DAILY GROANER - Friday, May 14th 2010
Good Morning Groanies,
On the drive in this morning my thoughts began to drift
elsewhere. (Don't worry, it didn't effect the attentive-
ness that I apply whenever I'm behind the wheel. I assure
you.) I started to think about "Star Wars" characters,
specifically Han Solo's co-pilot, Chewbacca.
Chewbacca was on my mind, but I couldn't tell you the
reason behind it. I thought about his overall look and
then it hit me, "Man, Chewbacca must smell just awful."
Right?
Basically, Chewbacca is a 7 foot tall dog man. He's covered
in long fur from head to toe. Have you ever seen him take
a bath? I think not! He's got to stink.
Remember when he fell into the garbage chute on the Death
Star? It was full of that dirty nasty water and garbage
and that monster that grabbed Luke. Gross!
Remember when he got covered in snow on the Planet Hoth
in "The Empire Strikes Back"? I'm sure he smelled like wet
dog for weeks. Guaranteed!
Oh, and let us not forget about Jabba the Hutt's under-
ground lock up in "Return of the Jedi". Do you think they
gave Chewie any TP in that cell? I don't think so!
That poor stinky smelly fuzz ball. Get him to a shower, a
pool or a fountain and then give him some shampoo and turn
him loose. And, if you don't mind, some animal grooming
clippers and a pair of pants.
Groaningly yours,
Steve
Email Steve: mailto:groaner@gophercentral.com
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Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office.
"Boss," he says, "we're doing some heavy house-cleaning
at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the
attic and the garage, moving and hauling stuff."
"We're short-handed, Smith" the boss replies. "I can't
give you the day off."
"Thanks, boss," says Smith "I knew I could count on you!"
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Q: What are the six worst years in a blonde's life.
A: Third grade.
Q: Why do you go to bed?
A: Because the bed won't come to you.
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