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THE DAILY GROANER - November 3, 2014
Good Morning Groanies, Well, we are only 3 days into November and I've already learned a few things. It's true that you learn something new everyday, which brings us to my list. It's quite remarkable, I know.
* The Top 5 Things I've Learned in November *1. This weather sucks monkey butts!
2. Showers are great whether they're hot, cold, baby, or bridal!
3. Poop spelled backwards is poop!
4. If you can't find China on a map it's probably because it's in a cabinet.
5. Math homework is nothing but problems.
Well, I hope you enjoyed learning about what I learned about while being completely unaware that learning was taking place then I learned that I was learning and now you're learning about what I learned that I learned. Learning.
Groaningly yours,
SteveP.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click
GopherArchivesJokes? Comments? Questions?
Email Steve*-- What's That Smell? --*Mama Mole, Papa Mole, and Baby Mole all live in a little hole. One morning Papa Mole sticks his head out of the hole, sniffs the air, and says, "Yum! I smell maple syrup!"
Then Mama Mole sticks her head out of the hole, sniffs the air, and says, "Yum! I smell strawberry jam!"
Then Baby Mole tries to stick his head out of the hole to sniff the air, but he can't because Mama and Papa Mole are both in the way.
He whines, "Jeez, all I can smell is molasses!"
*-- How About A Beer? --*A golf club walks into a local bar and asks the bartender for a beer.
The bartender refuses to serve him. "Why not," asks the golf club.
"You'll be driving later," replies the bartender.
*-- Q and A Quickies --*Q: Why aren't elephants allowed on beaches?
A: They can't keep their trunks up!
Q: Why does a tiger have stripes?
A: So he won't be spotted.
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