Subscribe to THE DAILY GROANER
 
Subscribe to DEAL OF THE DAY
 


fiogf49gjkf0d
THE DAILY GROANER - November 16, 2015

Good Morning Groanies,


Slogans can make or break your business. Some of the best are... "They're G-r-r-r-eat!", "The Best Part of Waking up is Folgers in Your Cup", "Don't Leave Home Without It", "I'm Lovin It", "Finger Lickin' Good" - the list goes on and on.

Then there are some slogans for random things that are just horrible like...

Wine Coolers - "For when you want to get just a little drunk, and then you have three dozen and get really drunk"

Iced Coffee - "For when you can't wait for hot coffee to get cold on it's own - $12 please!"

Dog Food - "They won't know what's in here"

Hot Dogs - "It's dog food for humans"

Hot Dogs - "It's technically food"

Hot Dogs - "What else are we gonna do with these old mattresses"

And one more thing. Don't go to doctor's office to get a vasectomy where the slogan is, "We're A Cut Above the Rest." Trust me.

Groaningly yours,
Steve


P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click GopherArchives

Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- A Whale of a Joke --*

Two whales walk into a bar. The first one says to the second one, "WOOOOOOWWWWWWWOOOOOOOEEEEEEEEEEE WWONNNKKKKKWOAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOO!"

The second whale says, "Frank, what the hell is wrong with you!"


*-- What Would You Get? --*

A grandfather couldn't decide which jacket to buy for his granddaughter, so he asked the young salesman.

"If you were buying a jacket for your girlfriend," the grandfather asked, "what would you get?"

"A bulletproof one," the salesman said. "I'm married."


*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?

A: A tuba toothpaste.


Q: Where do pencils go for vacation?

A: Pencil-vania.

***

Missed an Issue? Visit the Daily Groaner Archives