THE DAILY GROANER - Wednesday, May 8th 2013

Good Morning Groanies,

It's tough to know what to do with yourself when you have repairmen doing work on your home.

I don't want to get in their way, but then again I enjoy witnessing the project's progress unfold right before my eyes. Sometimes I like to ask questions of these trained professionals just to get a better understanding of what's going on. You know things like, "What's with all the hammering?", "Wrenches, am I right?", and "Can I eat this if it says non-toxic?"

It seems like they work better if I keep my distance so I think I'll just make myself scarce and go to another room and practice my yodeling or something. Hey, I just want to be considerate.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- Like A Baby --*
Sam and Greg lived in a retirement center and were sitting on a bench under a tree when Greg turned to the Sam and said, "Sam, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age. How do you feel?"

Sam says, "Well, I feel just like a newborn baby."

Greg Said, "Really! Like a baby!"

To which Sam replied, "Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet myself."


*-- A Turtle in the Big Apple --*
A turtle went to NY City and found himself in a bad neighborhood, where he was mugged by a gang of snails.

The cops asked him what happened, and he said, "I don't really know, it all happened so fast!"


*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: Why do moths fly with their legs open?

A: Have you seen the size of mothballs?


Q: How did Helen Keller drive herself crazy?

A: She was trying to read a stucco wall.

***
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