THE DAILY GROANER - Monday, January 14th, 2013

Good Morning Groanies,

For the last week or so my left hip has been giving me such grief when I wake up in the morning. The pain got so bad that I went to see a doctor who hopefully would offer me some relief.

While I was at the vet he said that I had a case of hip dysplasia and, since I was still relatively young, surgery would be the best course of action.

The only setback that I could see was that I would have to wear one of those dog cones around my neck for 8 weeks to avoid getting in the way of the healing process. I would look ridiculous, but I guess that's the price you pay if you want to be able to run and catch frisbees come springtime.

So, I told the doctor to schedule me for surgery and then he gave me a treat and scratched my belly. What doctor goes that extra mile to make you feel like such a good boy. What a guy, huh?

Groaningly yours,
Steve

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Jokes? Questions? Comments? Email Steve


*-- The Best Breast Stroke --*
A blonde, brunette and redhead woman decided to compete in the Breast Stroke division of the English Channel swim competition. The brunette came in first, the redhead second, then the blonde finally reached the shore completely exhausted.

After being revived with blankets and a drink she remarked, "I don't want to complain, but I'm pretty sure those other two girls used their arms.


*-- A Different Position --*
HUSBAND: Shall we try a different position tonight?

WIFE: That's a good idea... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart.


*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?

A: Trustworthy.


Q: When is it a good time to eat a window?

A: When it's jammed.

***
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