THE DAILY GROANER - Wednesday, Sept. 28th 2011

Good Morning Groanies,

"If I knew you were coming I would have baked a cake."

You've probably heard that old saying a time or two, right? Well, I was just thinking, what if the person that's coming doesn't care for cake or baked goods?

Also, what kind of a cake are we talking about? Is it chocolate? Or a rum cake? Or maybe a coffee cake? Are we talking sprinkles? What about some strawberries on the top or on the inside? I need specifics.

What if that cake that's being made contains something that the future potential eater may be allergic to?

And why cake? Why don't they make a birdhouse or a quilt or something like that? What about a diorama?

The saying should now be, "If I knew you where coming I would have called you prior to your arrival and asked you if there was anything that would tickle your fancy in the way of an after-dinner snack or dessert."

I guess that one doesn't quite roll off the tongue like the former. But then again, who doesn't like cake?

Groaningly yours,
Steve

Questions? Comments? Email Steve

Now You Can Follow the Daily Groaner on Twitter: DailyGroaner

*-- What's That Smell? --*
I once had a friend who never used toilet paper. One day curiosity got the best of me and I asked him what he uses instead. He replied, "Dryer Sheets".

I then asked him why. He gave a me a look and said, "How else could I get my bum to smell like meadows and raindrops!"

*-- My Wife, the Chicken --*
A man runs to the doctor and says, "Doctor, you've got to help me. My wife thinks she's a chicken!"

The doctor asks, "How long has she had this condition?"

"Two years," says the man.

"Then why did it take you so long to come and see me?" asked the shrink.

The man shrugs his shoulders and replies, "We needed the eggs."

*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What happened to the cat who ate a ball of yarn?

A: She had mittens!


Q: How do you know that your tiger is telling the truth?

A: He's not a lion.

Missed an Issue? Visit the Daily Groaner Archives