THE DAILY GROANER - April 6, 2015

Good Morning Groanies,

Did you have a happy Easter? We did at our house. The Easter Bunny stopped by with a basket, candy, and egg surprises for Jack. Jack couldn't believe it.

He said, "The Easter Bunny brought me treats in the house. He was so quiet. He didn't wake me up."

He was so funny. He thanked the Easter Bunny and then tore into all of the candy, eggs, and toys like he's going for a world record. It was crazy. Boy did Jack love the candy.

Stacy and I hope that the sugar crash happens soon. And I don't think he's blinked in 14 hours. I might need a hand in getting Jack down from the ceiling fan... and figuring out how that bunny got into my house. I guess I'm changing the locks.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- They've Stolen It All --*
A drunk stumbles out of the bar and phones the police to report that thieves had been in his car.

"They've stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, the radio, and even the accelerator," he cries out.

However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rings a second time and the same voice came over the line.

"Never mind," he said with a hiccup, "I got in the back seat by mistake."


*-- What Kind of Tracks Are They? --*
Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks.

The first blonde said: "These look like deer tracks."

And the other one said: "No they look like moose tracks."

They argued and argued for a while and they were still arguing when the train hit them.


*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What do lawyers wear to court?

A: Lawsuits!


Q: What do you call security guards working outside Samsung shops?

A: Guardians of the Galaxy.

***
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