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THE DAILY GROANER - Friday, July 9th 2010
Good Morning Groanies,
Today is going to be a lot of fun. I'm not just saying
that because it's Friday and it was a short work week
thanks to the 4th of July holiday. I'm saying it because
Stacy and I are going to babysit our 3 month old nephew,
Dylan, Tonight!
This will be our first time babysitting the little guy
and we couldn't be more excited. We've spent the better
part of this week baby-proofing our house. Hey, I know
he's only 3 months old, but safety first.
We also have some fun activities planned for the tyke.
First, we are going to play a game or two of ping pong.
I know Dylan is going to be great at it because of his
feverish development in the area of hand-eye coordination.
He's amazing at three months. You should see him. Next, we
are going to eat some pizza. It's going to be three meat,
four cheese pizza to be exact. And finally, Stacy, Dylan
and I are going to watch "Apocalypse Now" on re-mastered
DVD Widescreen with surround sound that'll make you feel
like you're on the Nung River in a Navy patrol boat. It's
gonna be awesome!
Hopefully by then he'll be so tired that he'll sleep
through the night... securely nestled inside an upside
down laundry basket, with a few phone books on top,
because that kid ain't going nowhere. And if he's fussy
we got plenty of NyQuil. That should do the trick.
This is gonna be a piece of cake.
Groaningly yours,
Steve
Email Steve: mailto:groaner@gophercentral.com
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Two elderly women were out driving in a large car-both
could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising
along they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red
but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger
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Mildred turned to her and said, "Oh, am I driving?"
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Q: Why do elephants have trunks?
A: Because they would look silly with glove compartments.
Q: What has one horn and gives milk?
A: A milk truck.
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