THE DAILY GROANER - Wednesday, April 25th 2012

Good Morning Groanies,

Well, this is it! Any day after this coming Friday could be the day that my son is born. I'm so excited that I can hardly sit still or write this column.

I just wanted to let all of my wonderful readers know that for the next few weeks or so The Daily Groaner will be mailing as usually, but will be a collection of "Best Of" issues.

But don't worry, I'll be back soon to share all of the fun, excitement and hilarity that Stacy and I are sure to experience during our transition into parenthood. Wow, I'm going to be a parent, a father. That's amazing. It used to be that I couldn't get arrested in this town, and now I will have a little guy to look after and call... my boy, little man, ankle biter, nose digger, droopy drawers, but most of all... son.

It's such a great feeling. I can't wait to meet him.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

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*-- Can We Have A Word? --*
Husband: Do you know that on an average women says between 10,000 to 35,000 words a day?

Wife: Yes, that's because they have to repeat everything often to men.

Husband: What?


*-- Calling Off --*
A phone call came to a school.

Caller: My daughter can't come to school today.

School Secretary: Alright, but what's the relation between you and the student?

Caller: This is my mother speaking.


*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?

A: Pull the pin and throw it back.


Q: Why did the blonde throw bread crumbs down the toilet?

A: To feed the toilet duck!

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