THE DAILY GROANER - Wednesday, Feb. 29th 2012

Good Morning Groanies,

Hey, guess what? Here's some of the stuff I learned this week:

1. I Have A Lot More Nose Hair Than I Thought
2. I Really Need To Get Some Sleep
3. Some Mysteries Should Remain That Way
4. The Oscars Were Last Sunday
5. I Drink Way Too Much Coffee
6. Soup Is A Great Snack
7. Scratching Yourself For More Than 15 Seconds Is Deemed Inappropriate By Many
8. Apparently There Are 29 Days in February This Year
9. Making Chewbacca Noises While in the Bathroom Freaks People Out
10. There Is No Doubt About It, I'm Not A Morning Person

Well, have a great rest of the week, enjoy the weekend and I'll catch you on the flip-flop.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

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*-- Two Blondes in the Woods --*
One day two blondes were out in the woods.

The first blonde was on one side of a river, and the second on the opposite side. The first blonde wanted to get to the other side of the river and so she called to the other blonde for help.

The second blonde had a flashlight and wanting to help, said, "I know! I'll shine the light of my flashlight across the river and you can walk across on the beam."

The first blonde said, "Are you crazy? I get half way across, and you turn off the light!"


*-- I'm Shrinking! --*
A man rushed into the doctor's office and shouted, "Doctor! I think I'm shrinking!!"

The doctor calmly responded, "Now, settle down. You'll just have to be a little patient."


*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: Why do sharks live in salt water?

A: Because pepper makes them sneeze!


Q: What did the geometry teacher say when she lost her parrot?

A: Where's my polygon?

***
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