THE DAILY GROANER - Wednesday, July 24th 2013

Good Morning Groanies,

The other day a local police officer informed me that I needed to head over to the village hall and purchase a vehicle sticker before my old one expired. That got me thinking... stickers?

This is 2013 and we still need to buy stickers to put on our vehicles. Come on! I can see putting stickers on a trapper keeper or on a guitar case or a lunch box, but for crying out loud, let's leave the cars out of it. Adults drive cars... well most of them anyway. We don't need stickers. We need to use our money for more important things like alcohol and commemorative coins.

I think I'm a bit old to be buying stickers for myself. I'll buy them for my son, but I really feel that I'm no longer age appropriate for that kind of an item. What am I going to do with stickers, trade them with my friends at a sleepover? Get real!

I know that it's just another clever way for the government to squeeze a few more bucks out of us and we're supposed to feel better by sticking a colorful picture some bratty third-grader drew in art class to the corner of our windshields.

Plus, for the money I'm paying for those damn vehicle stickers those things better be scratch-and-sniff.

Groaningly yours,
Steve

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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: Why do elephants have trunks?

A: Because they would look silly with glove compartments.


Q: What has one horn and gives milk?

A: A milk truck.


*-- Snake Goes to the Doctor --*
A old snake goes to see his Doctor.

"Doc, I need something for my eyes... can't see well these days". The Doc fixes him up with a pair of glasses and tells him to return in 2 weeks.

The snake comes back in 2 weeks and tells the doctor he's very depressed.

Doc says, "What's the problem... didn't the glasses help you?"

"The glasses are fine doc, I just discovered I've been living with a water hose the past 2 years!"


*-- More Q and A Quickies --*
Q: What dance was invented by Charles Dickens?

A: The Oliver Twist!


Q: Why are scarecrows always winning awards?

A: Because they're outstanding in their fields!

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