Amazing Reunion Between Lion & Human - As Seen on The View
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April 23, 2010
COLLEGE NEATNIK SACRIFICES FUN FOR A SQUEAKY CLEAN APARTMENT
DEAR ABBY: I have been overly neat since I was in middle
school. I am now in college and feel I have reached the
breaking point because I'm such a neat freak. I love having
everything neat and tidy, but I now spend less time being a
22-year-old and more time cleaning, scrubbing and organizing.
I can't sleep if I know there is clutter somewhere in the
apartment. I have passed up going out with friends if my
apartment isn't perfect. Everything has a place and a label.
It's getting tiring because I realize I haven't had any good
wholesome fun in a long time. I wish I could relax and be OK
with clutter like everyone else, instead of wasting my life
cleaning. Any advice?
-- OVERLY ORGANIZED IN TEXAS
DEAR OVERLY ORGANIZED: Yes, I do. March yourself to the
student health center and discuss this with a counselor
there. When the compulsion to have your apartment "perfect"
trumps your ability to enjoy your life, it's time to accept
that you have gone from neat to obsessive. There is treatment
for the problem, and once it begins you will be able to relax
and let go of your anxiety. So please don't wait to get the
help you need.
DEAR ABBY: I'm a 20-year-old female who has been dating my
boyfriend, "Will," for three years. Our long-distance rela-
tionship was going along just fine until the topic of his
21st birthday came up recently. Will mentioned in passing
that he's planning on going to a strip club with friends
to celebrate this momentous birthday.
Will says he just likes to look at women, that all men do
and it's completely fine. He didn't seem to care how I felt
about it. His mind was already made up. He wants me to be
more accepting of who he is, but it turns my stomach to
think of him hanging out at a strip club.
Abby, is a young man in a committed relationship going to a
strip club to drink and view naked women "normal"? Should I
not take this so personally? Or am I right to see this as a
lack of commitment to me?
-- OFFENDED IN FORT COLLINS, COLO.
DEAR OFFENDED: If your boyfriend had attempted to hide his
plans from you, or if he was planning on frequenting strip
clubs alone and often, I'd say you should feel threatened.
But he was open about going out to celebrate his "momentous"
birthday with his friends -- and plenty of women have been
known to visit clubs with male dancers. So calm down. This
has nothing to do with his "commitment" to you.
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DEAR ABBY: I am 42 years old and being married for the first
time in October. My parents divorced more than 20 years ago
and both remarried. My father will walk me down the aisle.
Dad lost my stepmother two years ago, and is still having a
hard time with it emotionally. Because of my age, I don't
expect anything from my parents except their emotional
support.
If it's all right with my parents, do you think it would be
appropriate to put on the invitations, "In lieu of gifts,
please make a donation to the American Cancer Society in
memory of (my stepmother's name)"?
-- LOVING DAUGHTER IN ARLINGTON, TEXAS
DEAR LOVING DAUGHTER: You are a sweetheart to think of it,
but doing so would be a huge breach of etiquette. In fact,
any mention of gifts on a wedding invitation is a no-no.
The way to handle it is, when asked where you are registered
for gifts, to verbally inform the questioner what your
wishes are.
What teens need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS and getting
along with peers and parents is in "What Every Teen Should
Know." To order, send a business-sized, self-addressed
envelope, plus check or money order for $6 (U.S. funds) to:
Dear Abby -- Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL
61054-0447. (Postage is included in the price.)
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as
Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline
Phillips. Write Dear Abby at
T="_new" class="abbylink">www.DearAbby.com
or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.