Wednesday, March 18, 2015

Good morning crew,

Despite my adamant insistence that we stay home last night, the wife employed her sweetest tongue and most devious guile to persuade me to go out for one more St. Patrick's Day romp.

She said, "Come oooOOON!"

Oh, that wily woman.

Including the parade and last weekend's bar hop, last night makes three St. Patrick's Day celebrations in one year. Not even in my 20s did I ever do that, but I sort of wish I had because then I wouldn't have done it now.

Well, you're never too old to learn, right?

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"During his weekly address to the nation, President Obama discussed higher education and said, 'The most important skill you can sell is your knowledge.' Or as English majors working at Starbucks put it, 'No it's not.'" -Jimmy Fallon

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"Yesterday was the L.A. Marathon. It's the only time of year you see someone running in the streets of Los Angeles when it's not the end of a car chase." -Conan O'Brien

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"March Madness is upon us. That's the big tournament where you start out with 64 teams and in only three weeks you're down to no girlfriend." -Seth Meyers

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While I was shopping in the mall with my three children, a display in the window of a lingerie store caught my eye. "Do you think Daddy would like this?" I asked the kids, as I pointed to the lacy pajamas with matching robe.

"No way," my horrified six-year-old son replied. "Daddy would NEVER wear that!"


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
My job is in the aerospace industry, and it's always been a challenge to explain what kind of work I do.

At one gathering, I tried several unsuccessful attempted explanations before deciding to be as generic as possible. When the subject came up while I was talking with a group of guys, I replied simply, "Defense contractor."

The men nodded, and as the conversation went on, I silently declared victory to myself. Then, one of them turned to me and asked, "So, what do you put up mainly? Chain-link?"