Monday, September 15, 2014

Good morning crew,

Today is that most sacred and holy of days...payday. It is a day of hope and optimism. A day when your dreams and goals seem just a little bit more obtainable. A day when opportunities blossom in front of you.

I personally believe it is the malicious nature of the universe that conspires to have all of your bills arrive the day after payday.

We can't have too much optimism out there, can we?

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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When I was a kid, we walked 10 miles to school every day, sometimes in the rain or snow. Man, did we feel stupid when we found out there was a bus.

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A teenage boy to his father... "Here's my report card and a list I've compiled of entrepreneurs who never finished high school." --Charles Almon in The Wall Street Journal

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"Your high school reunion. You get that letter in the mail and you feel like you only have sex months to make something of yourself." --Drew Carey

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Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work. His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire him if he didn't do something about it. So Tom went to his doctor who gave him a pill and told him to take it before he went to bed.

That night, Tom slept well and in fact beat, the alarm in the morning. He had a leisurely breakfast and drove cheerfully to work. "Boss", he said, "The pill actually worked!"

"That's fine" said the boss, "But where were you yesterday?"


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
The newspaper where I worked had just announced that when its new building was completed, the old one would be donated to the United Way. A few days later, someone came into our office soliciting contributions to that same organization.

"I'm sorry," one reporter quipped. "We gave the office."