Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Good morning crew,
My quarterly 401k report came today. The good news is that
my contributions are just about balancing my losses, so
I'm not exactly losing liquidity (depending on how you look
at it).
The bad news is that at this rate my 401k should be able to
fund my retirement as long as I drop dead no later than six
months after I retire.
Laugh it up,
Joe
mailto:joe@gophercentral.com
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And also, because it was only 10 hours." -Jimmy Fallon
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Chris Christie signed some of the toughest anti-bullying
laws in the nation. Then someone gave Christie a wedgie
and said, 'Ha ha! You've got a girl's last name.'"
-Conan O'Brien
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and Chinese take-out menus." -David Letterman
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I was working in the sun all day, putting finishing touches
on the new deck outside my house. My sister pulled into the
driveway, greeted me, and looked over my work.
"Wow," she gushed, "you're an expert."
Feeling complimented and satisfied, but...trying not to seem
egotistical, I responded... "Once you get going, it's pretty
easy!"
She looked puzzled and wondering if I'd misunderstood her I
asked, "What did you just say?"
She replied, "I said, your neck's burnt!"
*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes ---------------*
The Wolf Man comes home one day from a long day at the office.
"How was work, dear?" his wife asks.
"Listen! I don't want to talk about work!" he shouts.
"Okay. Would you like to sit down and eat a nice home cooked
meal?" she asks nicely.
"Listen!" he shouts again. "I'm not hungry! I don't wanna
eat! All right! Is that all right with you? Can I come home
from work and just do my own thing without you forcing food
own my throat? Huh?"
At this moment, the wolf man started growling, and throwing
things around the apartment in a mad rage. Looking out the
window, his wife sees a full moon and says to herself,
"I guess it's that time of the month."
____________________________________________________________
WHAT DID THE BUDDHIST SAY TO THE HOTDOG VENDOR?
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