Monday, January 23, 2017

Good morning crew,

So the PAWS fund-raiser turned out to be a lot more tame (a-hem) than last year. In fact, the event resembled a wedding more than anything else.

There was reserved seating at numbered tables, a wait staff served ricotta and spinach stuffed chicken with mashed potatoes and green beans, and there was an annoying guy who kept making speeches nobody wanted to listen to.

There was even a crappy three piece band that played boring, depressing, moody music all night, but unlike a wedding they didn't play 'Shout' or 'The Hokey Pokey' once.

I think I liked it better when it was a little more chaotic.

The one consistency with last year's 'Bark-n-Brew' was all of the beer vendors. There was a pretty good crowd represented, and it took a bit of work, but I managed to work my way through all of them. I say 'work' because a lot of these little, local breweries produce some challenging beer to drink.

I recall one beer that actually stuck to the roof of my mouth. But that was toward the end of the night and I may have been drinking gravy at that point.

On the other hand, one of the vendors was serving a rather heady stout, and with each sample glass they served they gave you a shish kabob of candied bacon to complement the beer.

It's never a wasted night when you get candied bacon and beer.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click GopherArchives




"Best Buy will start selling solar panels in an effort to promote energy conservation. Best Buy says you can find the panels right next to the 300 flat-screen TVs they leave on all day." -Jimmy Fallon

***
"Lululemon is the company that makes yoga pants that are so tight they cut off circulation to the part of your brain that decides how much money is OK to spend on yoga pants." -Jimmy Kimmel

***
"There are some accusations that Silicon Valley discriminates against people because of their age. Elderly groups are so furious about this that they plan to send Silicon Valley an angry fax." -Conan O'Brien

***
A man is sitting in the coach section of a flight from New York to Chicago biting his finger nails and sweating profusely. Noticing his disturbed expression, a flight attendant walks over and says, "Sir, can I get you something from the bar to calm you down?"

The man gives a nod of approval while shaking terribly. She comes back with a drink and he downs it quickly. Ten minutes later, the flight attendant sees the same man shaking and biting his nails. She brings him another drink which he swallows immediately.

A half hour later she returns to see that the man is shaking uncontrollably, and apparently crying. "My goodness," the flight attendant says, "I've never seen someone so afraid to fly."

"I'm not afraid of flying," says the man sobbing loudly, "I'm trying to give up drinking."




*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
Judi and Gayle were at an auto show. There they saw a hot-rod with a jacked up rear end.

"Judi, why is the back end higher than the front?" Gayle asked.

"Don't you know ANYTHING?" Judi sighed exasperated. "If you've got the back up like that, then you're always going downhill!"