Monday, June 6, 2016
Good morning crew,
"I'm really motivated today," enthused the wife Sunday morning, or afternoon rather, "we're really going to get some landscaping done today."
"Sounds good to me," I responded. "What do you want to do first?"
"First," she said, "we need to do a little shopping."
Four hours, $90 worth of potted flowers and $100 worth of groceries later, we had just enough time left in the day to whip up a little barbecue and recuperate from the day's shopping with 5 or 6 beers.
All the old mulch, the paving stones, the gravel, and the weeds was all right where we left it.
Well, one step at a time.
Laugh it up,
Joe
joe@gophercentral.com
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"One of the winners of this year's Scripps National Spelling Bee has an older brother who won the competition in 2014. Or as their dad put it, 'I'm just going to throw these baseball mitts away.'" -Jimmy Fallon
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"People have been selling fake parking spaces. They charge people to park in spots that they have no ownership of. Here's a tip to avoid becoming a victim of this fraud. If you find a parking space during the festival, it's a scam." -Jimmy Kimmel
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"A new study shows that young adults suffering from insomnia are at higher risk of a stroke. So, that information should help you finally get some sleep." -Seth Meyers
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On a family vacation one summer, we crossed Wyoming and noted several historical points of interest. The children were especially interested because they enjoyed the computer game "Oregon Trail," which gives players a taste of the hardships the pioneers endured. We stopped at the famous South Pass to look at the wagon tracks still visible in the dirt.
Squinting out over the desolate, wind-swept landscape, my daughter nodded and said grimly, "This is where my oxen always die."
*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
At Sunday school they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs.
Later that day his mother noticed him lying down, curled up on the floor as though he were ill. She said, "Johnny what is the matter?" Little Johnny responded, "I have a pain in my side. I think I'm gonna have a wife!"