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Thursday, February 16, 2012

Good morning crew,

I completely ran out of time on Valentine's Day to do anything creative. Who was the genius who scheduled Valentine's Day on a Tuesday anyway? So instead of doing something cheap and romantical at home I was forced to go out.

The only problem was that getting a dinner reservation at 7:00 p.m. on Valentine's Day was difficult to say the least. The only restaurant I could get us into at all was a place called Big Lou's House of Pork.

Surprisingly they didn't have a wait, and it was even half priced margarita night.

They had a Valentine's Day special; the Lovers Pork Platter for Two. It was pulled pork, pork brisket, pork loin and a half slab of barbecue ribs, along with two cornbread muffins, potato salad and baked beans. If that doesn't spell romance, nothing does.

I have to admit it was pretty good, and there was so much food the girlfriend and I BOTH got to take home leftovers. And just like in those fancy, downtown restaurants where the server does some cool origami with the aluminum foil, she wrapped ours up in the shape of a pig.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"Valentine's Day is weird. A nude flying baby that shoots arrows isn't a holiday. It's a horror movie." -Jimmy Kimmel

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"A new study found that students who are taught abstinence end up with better math scores. Of course, if you join the math team the abstinence takes care of itself." -Jimmy Fallon

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"English farmers are feeding their cattle healthier food to reduce the amount of gas they produce. Farmers also say they won't fall for the old 'pull my hoof' trick." -Conan O'Brien

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At the banquet of their 25th wedding anniversary Tom was asked to give his friends a brief account of the benefits of a marriage of such long duration.

"Tell us Tom, just what is it you have learned from all those wonderful years with your wife?"

Tom responds, "Well, I've learned that marriage is the best teacher of all. It teaches you loyalty, forbearance, meekness, self-restraint, forgiveness -- and a great many other qualities you wouldn't have needed if you'd stayed single."


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*

A woman goes into a sporting goods store to buy a rifle. "It's for my husband," she tells the clerk.

"Did he tell you what gauge to get?" asked the clerk.

"Are you kidding?" she says. "He doesn't even know that I'm going to shoot him!"