RELAX... It's Easy With The Tush-eez Cushion...
http://pd.gophercentral.com/u/1060/c/186/a/505
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Monday, March 8, 2010
Good morning crew,
It was a painful weekend. On Saturday old Mason talked me
into helping him move a couple lead-lined couches up two
flights of stairs in his new house. And then later that
evening I let the girl friend convince me to go to a club
where a bunch of her friends were having a night out
instead of staying at home and lying in traction like I
should have been after wrestling those couches all after-
noon.
Jumping up and down on a dance floor for three hours was
not exactly the therapy I needed. Consequently I woke up
Sunday morning with my back in the shape of a question mark.
I feel like there should be a law suit in there somewhere.
Laugh it up,
Joe
mailto:joe@gophercentral.com
P.S. We now have a Forum. You can post comments on this and
recent issues at... http://cleanlaffs.gophercentral.com
***
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***
My son, a high school senior, went to take a national
literacy test recently. A sign on the classroom door read
"Literacy Testing in Progress: Do Not Distrub!"
***
I posed this question to my thoughtful father: "If you could
have any superpower in the world, what would it be?"
He replied, "Russia."
***
I won't be hiring this assistant soon, even if her resume
boasts, "I'm a team player with 16 years of assassinating
experience."
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When the icemaker in our new refrigerator broke, my husband
dropped by the store to arrange for repairs. Because the
sun was bright, my husband's eyes hadn't adjusted to the
dim light inside in time to see a woman sitting on the floor
examining carpet samples.
He stepped on her leg and she screamed, causing him to jump
into a display of fireplace tools that went crashing in
every direction. Unnerved, my husband stumbled over to
the service desk, and as he went to rest his hands on the
counter, he flipped over a bowl full of little mints,
scattering them everywhere.
After taking a deep breath to calm himself, he announced to
the wide-eyed woman working there, "My refrigerator doesn't
work."
"I don't doubt it," she replied.
*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes ---------------*
Irving goes into a restaurant and orders potato latkes. When
they come, he complains that they do not look good and he
changes his order to blintzes. After he eats the blintzes,
he stands up and starts to leave the restaurant.
"Wait a second," the manager shouts after him. "You have not
paid for your blintzes."
"What are you talking about?" Irving says. "Those blintzes
were an even exchange. I gave you the potato latkes for them."
"Yes," says the manager, "but you did not pay for the latkes
either."
"Why should I pay for them?" asks Irving. "I didn't eat them." =
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