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Wednesday, July 29, 2015Good morning crew,
My plans for the afternoon include going to the gym, cutting the lawn and doing laundry.
You wouldn't think this kind of stuff is exciting, and it isn't, but not every day can be an adventure.
I try to distract myself with a beer to two, or maybe a cigar, but the last time I smoked in the weightroom at the health club I got yelled at.
Laugh it up,
Joe
joe@gophercentral.comP.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click
GopherArchives***"Yesterday, the U.S. Olympic Committee announced they're withdrawing Boston's bid to host the 2024 Olympic Games. The USOC has to come up with another city from the United States to bid against Paris, Rome, and Toronto, and most people think that city will be Los Angeles - which is exciting. The summer Olympics could bring some much-needed traffic to the L.A. area." -Jimmy Kimmel
***"The Orange County Fair in California is going on now, and features deep-fried Slim-Fast bars. It's perfect if you haven't decided if you want to be fat or not. The fair also features deep-fried pizza, deep-fried birthday cake, and deep-fried pickles stuffed with peanut butter. Not featured at the Orange County Fair: oranges. Not a single, solitary orange." -Seth Meyers
***"Two ATMs here in New York were shut down for dispensing counterfeit money. People were suspicious after one guy kept asking, 'Hey, can you break a 23?'" -Jimmy Fallon
***Before my daughter went on her first date, I gave her "the talk."
"Sometimes, it's easy to get carried away when you are with a boy," I said. "Remember, a short moment of indiscretion could ruin your life."
"Don't worry," she said. "I don't plan on ruining my life until I get married."
*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*Some people bend over backward not to be politically correct. A while ago, I overheard my sister, a travel agent, confirm her client's flight this way: "Your confirmation code is F as in Foxtrot, R as in Romeo, and I as in, uuuh, Native American."