Monday, March 4, 2013

Good morning crew,

As it turned out I didn't get to compete after all. While there was a pretty good turnout of kids at the tournament the number of adults who showed up was disappointingly small.

So I didn't have anybody to compete with.

I suggested that they just match me with four ten-year-olds at the same time, but nobody wanted to go for that. There was also a fifteen-year-old girl who didn't have anybody to spar with, but they wouldn't put me with her either.

Those event organizers just refuse to let anybody have any fun.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"A farmer in Oregon was eaten by his pigs. The pigs ate the farmer. But in the overall race, humans are still way ahead." -Jay Leno

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"You know what Portland has lot of? Microbreweries. I think they are like regular breweries, but only serve midgets." -Craig Ferguson

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"There's a new technique that lets doctors perform kidney transplants in 45 minutes. Because when you're getting a kidney transplant, your main concern is always, 'Can you do it in less than an hour?'" -Jimmy Fallon

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Our 25-year-old son moved back home with an eye toward socking away money to buy a condo. We never bothered asking how long he'd planned to stay, but I got a pretty good idea when I walked into his room recently. In the corner was a milk jug with a few coins in it and a label that read "Condo down payment."


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
A collector of rare books ran into an acquaintance who told him he had just dumped an old Bible that he found in the attic into the local book depository. He happened to mention that Guten-somebody-or-other had printed it.

"Not Gutenberg?" gasped the collector.

"Yes, that was it!"

"You idiot! You've discarded one of the first books ever printed. A copy recently sold at auction for half a million dollars!"

"Oh, I don't think this book would have been worth anything close to that much," replied the man. "It was scribbled all over in the margins by some clown named Martin Luther."