Silly Shaped Bands are traded & Collected all over the world.
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Thursday, July 8, 2010
Good morning crew,
I really had only two missions in mind when going to Lake
Geneva (well, three if you count drinking a kiddy pool
sized volume of beer). Those were to eat at Popeye's, my
favorite barbecue restaurant in the tri-state area, and to
enjoy some water sports on the lake.
We ate at Popeye's our first night there, which was delicious
as it always is, and I was ecstatic to be able to reserve a
speed boat and a giant inflatable for tubing on the lake the
next day! Considering it was Fourth of July weekend I was
afraid our options would be restricted to a couple of paddle
boats and water wings.
Sunday morning dawned hot, sunny and breezy and I was eager
to get out on the lake for an afternoon of heart-in-your-
mouth adventures on the lake.
We had rented the boat from a place called LeatherLips Water-
sports and when we got there they installed us in a very nice
six-seater speed boat. However, the first thing I noticed was
the conspicuous absence of the inflatable. When I asked about
it the girl who was reading us the rules-and-regulations gave
me a forbidding look.
"Oh, I don't think you want to do any tubing today."
"Why's that?" I asked.
"The lake is VERY choppy...and there are a LOT of boats out
on the water today."
She went on to describe the apocalyptic conditions on the
lake. The fifteen-foot white caps grinding the thousands of
boats crammed onto the lake into indistinguishable flotsam
while the corpses of hapless boaters and tubers floated
like so much jetsam in the foamy waves pinked by their own
life's blood.
By the time she was finished no one on board except me wanted
to do any tubing. In fact, they were leery of taking the boat
out at all!
When I insisted on taking a tube out, the girl put her hands
up like Pontius Pilate and said, "Okay, sir, but I really
wouldn't recommend it."
So I finally relented.
Of course, when we did get out on the water it was almost
completely calm. The tiny bit of chop we experienced wouldn't
even be considered waves on Lake Michigan. In addition, the
lake was almost completely empty. And to add insult to injury,
other than the handful of sailboats on the water, every one
of the motorboats was hauling happy, gleeful, perfectly safe
children around the lake on tubes!
Needless to say I was more than annoyed. But I really only
have myself to blame. It was my fault for taking boating
safety advice from a 16-year-old girl.
Laugh it up,
Joe
mailto:joe@gophercentral.com
P.S. We have a *NEW* archive page! You can read newsletters
from Clean Laffs to Bizarre News and dozens of titles in
between. Years worth of issues! Just check out the link at
the bottom of the page!
***
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***
"Inside every older person is a younger person -- wondering
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***
My girlfriend likes to role-play. For the past five years,
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***
Sitting at a stoplight, I was puzzling over the meaning of
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=
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Although this married couple enjoyed their new fishing boat
together, it was the husband who was behind the wheel
operating the boat. He was concerned about what might happen
in an emergency. So one day out on the lake he said to his
wife, "Please take the wheel, dear. Pretend that I am having
a heart attack. You must get the boat safely to shore and
dock it."
So she drove the boat to shore.
Later that evening, the wife walked into the living room where
her husband was watching television. She sat down next to him,
switched the TV channel, and said to him, "Please go into the
kitchen, dear. Pretend I'm having a heart attack and set the
table, cook dinner and wash the dishes."
*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes ---------------*
A lawyer walks into his client's death row cell and says,
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says. " Okay. What's the bad news? " "The bad news is that
the Governor won't issue a stay of your execution...you go
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possibly could be the good news?"
"The good news is that I got your voltage reduced!"
____________________________________________________________
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