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Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Good morning crew,

Welcome to winter folks. Well, not quite; in fact, winter is a month off, but with reports of record-breaking snow in portions of the upper Midwest and temperatures barely making 30 degrees here in the Chicago area it certainly feels like winter.

Plus, after the time change last week it is getting dark around 5 o'clock which gives me a psychological and emotional impression of winter. All told I think my SAD is going to kick in early this year.

It's that pesky global warming.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"Members of the Danish National Chamber Orchestra released a video of themselves performing while eating the world's hottest chili peppers. In response, the Red Hot Chili Peppers released a video of themselves eating a Danish." -Seth Meyers

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"The October jobs report was released and it showed that unemployment has hit its lowest point in six years. Also hitting its lowest point: anyone who tried that new Doritos-flavored Mountain Dew." -Jimmy Fallon

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"Amazon has a new digital assistant. It's their version of Apple's Siri. It's called Echo. They say it's going to revolutionize the way we loudly repeat ourselves at electronic devices." -Jimmy Kimmel

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Before going on vacation, I went to a tanning salon. I was under the lights a bit long and the protective shades I wore left a big white circle around each eye. Gazing at myself in the mirror the next day, I thought, "Man, I look like a clown."

I had almost convinced myself that I was overreacting until I got in line at the grocery store. I felt a tug at my shirt and looked down to see a toddler staring up at me. He asked, "Are you giving out balloons?"


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*

I was at a stop light, behind a car with a bumper sticker that said "Honk if you love Jesus."

So I honked. The driver leaned out his window, gave me an very impolite gesture, and yelled, "Can't you see the light is still red, you MORON!?"