Monday, August 15, 2011

Good morning crew,

One of the girls in the office said something today that I found amusing. When I asked her how her weekend was she said that it was more fun than she expected because she remembered an extra hundred bucks she had not accounted for.

Apparently she had a little 'stash' tucked away in her underwear drawer, or somewhere (she wouldn't tell me), and she forgot it was there until Friday night.

Maybe it's a chick thing, because I know where every single cent I earn is and goes. I even count the contents of the change jar I keep on my kitchen counter before I take it to the bank because I don't trust their change counters (and I have made them count it twice before because their total did not match mine).

Since today is payday I have made a detailed two week budget to account for my expenditures, and nowhere in it is there room for a secret stash. Even if I had the money I'm not sure who I would be stashing it away from. Myself?

Do a lot of people do this? Maybe I am missing out on a valuable money-saving or management tool. Write in and let me know!

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

P.S. We have a *NEW* archive page! You can read newsletters from Clean Laffs to Bizarre News and dozens of titles in between. Years worth of issues! Just check out the link at the right of the page!


***
"Financial analysts are worried that we may be headed for a double-dip recession. I don't know, but that sounds delicious to me." -Jimmy Kimmel

***
"A new report shows that due to the weak economy right now, more Americans are canceling their cable television. Good luck trying to live without eight shows about cakes." -Conan O'Brien

***
"After all the rioting in London this week, officials are worried that it could mean security problems for the Olympics next year. On the bright side, the guy running with the torch will just blend right in." -Jimmy Fallon

***
My 7-year-old daughter came home from school one day, held up her middle finger, and asked me what it meant. I was so shocked that I could say only, "Shame on you," followed by, "If anyone does that to you, just say, "Shame on you" to that person.

Next week we were at the dinner table when my husband let out a huge belch. I reprimanded him by saying, "Shame on you."

Imagine my husband's shock when my daughter held up her middle finger, showed it to him, and exclaimed, "Mom, you forgot to give Daddy the 'shame on you' sign."


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
A New York retail clerk was suffering from aching feet. "It's all those years of standing," his doctor declared. "You need a vacation. Go to Miami, soak your feet in the ocean and you'll feel better."

When the man got to Florida, he went into a hardware store, bought two large buckets and headed for the beach.

"How much for two buckets of that seawater?" he asked the lifeguard.

"A dollar a bucket," the fellow replied with a straight face.

The clerk paid him, filled his buckets, went to his hotel room and soaked his feet. They felt so much better he decided to repeat the treatment that afternoon. Again he handed the lifeguard two dollars. The young man took the money and said, "Help yourself."

The clerk started for the water, then stopped in amazement. The tide was out. "Wow," he said, turning to the lifeguard. "Some business you got here!"