Friday, November 6, 2015

Good morning crew,

Promotion testing is coming up this weekend at the school. That means all of the little kiddies are showing up all of a sudden and trying to cram eight weeks worth of training into this week. It has made for some crowded classes. There were a good 20 kids in yesterday's children's class.

Have you ever tried to teach three little kids one thing, two different little kids something else, and three more kids something else again...all at the same time?

I am starting to run out of tricks to keep them in line. Yesterday afternoon I resorted to threatening them with a stick. If you had asked me, when I graduated from college, what I would be doing in 20 years, I can safely promise you that I would never have guessed that I would be chasing a room full of little kids around with a stick.

Life never turns out the way you expect.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"A new study found that heavy drinkers outlive non-drinkers, but the ways they die are a lot more embarrassing." -Jimmy Fallon

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"A Canadian pharmacy had to apologize this weekend after accidentally handing out bipolar medication on Halloween instead of candy. The victims say they're sad that it happened, but happy that it happened." -Seth Meyers

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"A new study shows current members of Congress speak at a 10th grade level. When reached for comment, Congressman Eric Cantor said, 'Nuh-uh!'" -Conan O'Brien

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When I was a 20-something college student, I became quite friendly with my study partner, a 64-year-old man, who had returned to school to finish his degree. He confessed, with a wink, that he had once thought more than friendship might be a possibility between us.

"So what changed your mind?" I asked him.

"I went to my doctor and asked if he thought a 40-year age difference between a man and woman was insurmountable. He looked at my chart and said, 'You're interested in someone who's 104?!'"


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
A man goes into the home improvement store and says, "I'd like to order 5,000 finishing bricks."

"Certainly," says the salesman, "Are they for a garage?"

"No," says the man; "They're for a Bar-B-Q."

"Why do you need so many bricks for a bar-b-q?" asks the salesman.

"Well," says the man, "we live in a 3rd floor flat."