Thursday, September 6, 2012

Good morning crew,

Promotion testing at the school this weekend. Not for me. For all the little kiddies. I will just be assisting. You know, I have been teaching taekwondo for almost a year and a half, and I still cannot control those little maniacs.

But I am getting better. I only made one five-year-old cry this week.

Then the wife has promised to take me out to dinner. It will be nice to see her for a change. This week she took the opportunity to make a little cash money by dog and house-sitting for an old friend of hers. So I haven't seen her all week. It has been just like being a bachelor again except not fun.

This week would have been a lot less boring for me if she had just let me date.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"A man in Thailand was arrested with more than 10,000 pairs of stolen underwear. Legal experts are expecting a brief trial." -Jimmy Fallon

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"The agriculture department says we now have the smallest cattle population in 60 years. That shows you how fat we're getting. We're close to putting cows on the endangered species list." -Jay Leno

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"Studies are showing that Republican candidates are buying a lot of their ad time on the Weather Channel. You can tell because last night, the weatherman blamed the cold front on immigration and gay marriage." -Conan O'Brien

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A woman walked into the elevator tossing her keys up in the air and catching them. After one too many tosses, she dropped the keys, and we watched as they disappeared into the crack between the open doors and the floor.

I felt terrible for her. Or I did until she cried, "Oh no! Not again!"


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
Heading down the interstate, our car passed through a huge swarm of gnats so dense that their bodies made popping noises as they hit the windshield. "I can't get over how loud they are," my wife said.

"Well, we are hitting them at 65 miles an hour," I pointed out.

Her reply left me speechless. "There's no way bugs can fly that fast!"