Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Good morning crew,

Payday today! What's left of it. Okay, I'm exaggerating a little bit, but if you have gotten your first pay check of the year already you have noticed the new deduction. For most people it will be the increase in the Social Security deduction.

It is 2 percent, but if your income doesn't change, like mine, 2 percent is a lot! So now I have to figure out where I can cut 2 percent out of my expenses. Which is what a responsible person does.

Why is it that when my income goes down I have to cut expenses, but when the federal government doesn't make the tax revenue it expects it can just borrow unlimited funds (that I will eventually have to pay for)? Doesn't seem fair, does it?

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"Archeologists investigating an ancient shipwreck in Italy have discovered pills over 2,000 years old. Meanwhile, my mom was like, 'That date is just a recommendation. They're still good.'" -Jimmy Fallon

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"Justin Bieber is being sued for allegedly beating up his ex-bodyguard. Which begs the question ? who hires a bodyguard that Justin Bieber can beat up?" -Conan O'Brien

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"My New Year's resolution this year was to get a gym membership, use it twice, and then never use it again. I'm already halfway there." -Jimmy Kimmel

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An elderly patient paid me a wonderful compliment. "You're beautiful," she said. I must have looked skeptical because she was quick to assure me that she was sincere. "It's just that I rarely hear flattering comments about my looks," I explained.

She smiled understandingly. "That's just because you're fat. But it doesn't mean you aren't pretty."


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
Basic Math is the subject I teach at a small community college in western North Carolina. I call one part of the curriculum Practical Applications for Living in the Real World. The day after I presented a lesson on simple and compound interest, one of my older students approached me in the hallway.

"You really taught me a great deal about my life yesterday," he said. "I realized I've been struggling with a lack of interest, compounded daily, for thirty years."