Thursday, December 27, 2012

Good morning crew,

It can be done! By dint of fanatical discipline and iron will power (not to mention a couple lucky nights at the casino) I managed to finance the entire holiday in cash. I just got my credit card statement in the mail and I am within sight of actually paying it off! I'm not across the street of the promised land of living debt free, but I can see it from where I'm standing.

It's a good feeling.

Now comes the real challenge; New Year's Eve. The wife and I have a couple loose plans in place, if only we can keep from ending up downtown, or in a casino, or anyplace with linen tablecloths we shouldn't have to go to the credit card. Pretty much we'd need to stick to either the local bar or a house party.

I'll let you know how it goes next year.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"My father spent the last 20 years of his life writing letters. If someone thanked him for a wedding present, he thanked them for thanking him and there was no end to the exchange but death." -Evelyn Waugh

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"The noblest of all dogs is the hot-dog; it feeds the hand that bites it. -Laurence Peter

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"Accuracy is to a newspaper what virtue is to a lady, but a newspaper can always print a retraction." -Adlai Stevenson

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When my daughter was about 9-years-old I became pregnant again. Of course, she wanted to know how it happened, so I gave what I considered an appropriate explanation of the process.

She asked, "Did you do that to get me?"

I said "yes," and she responded, "And you did it again?"


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
Because of the reaction people have when they wake up and realize it's a workday again and the weekend is over, the first day of the week is called Moanday.

Many people too busy to cook on the second day of the week just open a can of beans. Hence the day is known as Tootsday.

By the third day of the week, people are wondering when they can ever find the time to get everything done this week that they need to, hence the day is known as Whensday.

Too bleary to even count properly, people think it's only Day Three of the week on the next day, therefore it's er- roneously called Thirdsday.

On the last day of the workweek, people often go out "for a few" after work. By the time they get home, they're too tired to cook anything elaborate, so they just throw a piece of meat, chicken, or fish in the skillet. That's why the day is known as Fryday.

Saturday night all the singles let loose. There's a lot of sexual hijinks. It's pretty obvious why the day is called Satyrday.

And on the last day of the week--and the weekend--people look at all the items on their to-do lists that didn't get crossed off, groan aloud, and make themselves promises they won't keep. Therefore the day is called Soonday.