Thursday, September 12, 2013

Good morning crew,


Joe, you are constantly talking about living paycheck to paycheck, you've got to cut expenses, etc. Then most of your newsletters tell of casino trips, festivals, impulse purchases, etc. Do you see the cause and effect here? Sailboats, motorcycles, pick-up trucks, are all things you've bought then complained about their costs. You need some new subject matter. -Bob


Bob, we write about what consumes our lives. If you wrote something like I do you would write about whatever it is you spend your time doing. I write about impulse control problems and the inevitable regret.

But remember, this is Clean Laffs. I am limited in my subject matter. If I wrote about what really went on in my day-to-day life this publication would be about as exciting as stereo instructions.

And as a side note; I do not have a pick up truck. Please pay attention!

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"Las Vegas is about to unveil what will be the world's largest Ferris wheel. They are billing it as a new way to throw up on the streets of Las Vegas." -Conan O'Brien

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"Fashion Week held its first-ever plus-sized fashion show. Apparently, they're hoping it creates a more positive, body-friendly atmosphere ? which it might if they didn't call everyone there 'plus-sized.'" -Jimmy Fallon

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"Vin Diesel is with us tonight. Vin is not his real name. His real name is Vehicle Identification Number." -Jimmy Kimmel

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In the British documentary 56 Up, a man shared that he had earned a law degree at Oxford. Then, in his thick English accent, he proudly proclaimed that he was now a "barrister."

My 13-year-old daughter wasn't impressed. "So," she said, "he spent all that effort getting an Oxford law degree, and now he works at Starbucks?"


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
My wife is a very adventurous cook. "How does this sound?" she called out from the kitchen. "Bonito, surimi, and anchovies in a decadent, silky broth."

"Sounds delicious," I hollered back. "Is that what we're having tonight?"

"No. I'm reading from this packet of cat food."