Friday, November 21, 2014

Good morning crew,

My mother-in-law has to work on Thanksgiving, so my the wife's parents decided to invite us, and their other daughter and their grandkids to their house this weekend for a pre-Thanksgiving Thanksgiving.

Which is fine with me. I am not going to say no to an extra turkey dinner. But they tasked my wife with bringing a green bean casserole...which mean they have really tasked me with bringing a green bean casserole.

Now, there are all sorts of home made from scratch recipes for green bean casserole which start in the spring with instructions to plant a square yard of green beans, but there are also simpler recipes, and if I am anything it is simple.

More or less it is a couple cans of green beans, a can of cream of mushroom soup, some french fried onions and a little cheese. If you are feeling really adventurous you can add a little crumbled bacon. And maybe a pinch or two of cayenne pepper. Some people like some shallots. You can add some sour cream, too.

But basically it is green beans, mushroom soup, french fried onions and cheese.

I'm going to try not to get carried away.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"Fifty percent of the nation is covered in snow. Record low temperatures, a very cold autumn so far. But on the bright side, you're one good ice storm away from getting out of Thanksgiving with the in-laws." -Jimmy Kimmel

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"Last week a Florida woman and her 20-year-old daughter gave birth within three hours of each other at the same hospital. I guess there's nothing like giving birth to take the edge off becoming a grandma." -Seth Meyers

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"Google has developed image-recognition software that can accurately capture what's happening in a photo. But it still has some bugs. It described Kim Kardashian's recent photo as 'Woman being chased by two Butterball turkeys.'" -Jimmy Fallon

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When the U.S. Mint reissued two-dollar bills, I thought they might someday become collectors' items. I went to the bank and picked up a hundred, serially numbered and still in their original band. On my next trip to my parents' house, I gave the $200 to my mother and said, "Take good care of these. They might be worth something someday."

Several months later I asked Mom if she was keeping the two dollar bills safe. "Oh, yes!" she replied. "I deposited them in the bank the day after you left."


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
In my English-as-a-second-language class, I explained the difference between a watch and a clock. I told the students that when it was a large timepiece on a wall and not attached to your body, it was called a clock. When it was worn on your body, it was called a watch.

A few days later we had a power outage, and our classroom clocks had not been reset. I asked Luis, who was wearing a wristwatch, for the time. Luis looked at his wrist, and then confidently announced, "It is exactly ten o'watch."