Monday, August 5, 2013

Good morning crew,

I think parenting has changed, and I'll tell you what I mean. I was teaching two little girls the other day at the school. Both white belts, sisters, actually, ages four and five.

Now, it is a martial arts school, so a little bit of yelling is expected, but as the minutes trickled past and they began to get distracted, my volume increased. It is one of the few ways I can keep their attention.

They were having a difficult time executing the combination of moves I was trying to teach them, and they were getting frustrated with the repetition. I have to admit, I was too.

Eventually, after the tenth or twelfth time I showed them the combination and they were unable to repeat it, I grabbed a kicking target and smacked it down on the mat right at their feet with a gunshot-like crack.

They jumped and I started chasing them around in a circle while we all screamed like a maniacs. Eventually I got them to settle down again and we were able to finish the class.

After class was over their mother, who was watching the whole episode, walked up to me. I thought I was going to get a complaint for treating her kids a little too harshly, but said, "You're such a good teacher!"

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"Facebook has a new feature that allows you to see what you were posting a year ago. You just log on to Facebook and click on the 'I'm wasting my life' button." -Conan O'Brien

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"It's rumored that AMC's show 'The Walking Dead' is adding a zombie baby to the cast for next season. That's right, a drooling, hungry creature that can't talk or listen to reason � most people just call that a baby." -Jimmy Fallon

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"Hawaii has a new service that they hope will reduce the homeless population. What they do is buy the homeless people a one-way ticket back home. If homeless people don't want to fly, they will pay for them to go home on a cruise. That is just what the cruise industry needs � 'Now with homeless people.'" -Jimmy Kimmel

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Think you're a genius? Take the below quiz. Passing requires 4 correct answers.

1) How long did the Hundred Years War last?
2) Which country makes Panama hats?
3) From which animal do we get cat-gut?
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?
7) What was King George VI's first name?
8) What color is a purple finch?
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?

All done, genius? Check your answers below.


1) How long did the Hundred Years War last? 116 years
2) Which country makes Panama hats? Ecuador
3) From which animal do we get cat gut? Sheep and Horses
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October revolution? November
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of? Squirrel fur
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal? Dogs
7) What was King George VI's first name? Albert.
8) What color is a purple finch? Crimson.
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from? New Zealand.


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
In one of K.C.'s classes, they were discussing the qualifications to be president of the United States. It was pretty simple - the candidate must be a natural born citizen of at least 35 years of age. However, one girl in the class immediately started in on how unfair was the requirement to be a natural born citizen.

In short, her opinion was that this requirement prevented many capable individuals from becoming president. KC and the class were just taking it in and letting her rant, but everyone's jaw hit the floor when she wrapped up her argu- ment by stating, "What makes a natural born citizen any more qualified to lead this country than one born by C-section?"