Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Good morning crew,

We are finally getting some real summer weather around here. It is going to be in the 90s all week. I don't work outside, so it doesn't make too much difference to me, but I noticed my tomato and pepper plants are needing water twice a day. I don't know if that is good for them or bad for them, but I almost cannot wait to try making my own, homegrown salsa, that is if I don't eat all of the ingredients first. I jumped the gun and picked a pepper to go with my dinner last night, and while it was not completely ripe yet, it was delicious.

I also have my fingers crossed for the weather this weekend. A small group of us are planning to head up to Kenosha for our annual Renaissance Faire pilgrimage, and the early forecast looks like 80 degrees and sunny. Practically perfect weather. Of course, that's five days from now. I should be so lucky.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"Residents of northeast Colorado want to divide Colorado into two states, and they want to call the new state North Colorado. If you're going to go to the trouble of creating a new state, give it a cool name like Danger Zone, or Colorado 2: The Reckoning." -Jimmy Kimmel

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"A new study found that Americans are exercising more than ever but still not losing much weight. Not good ? in fact, it's all I could think about on my jog to Dunkin' Donuts." -Jimmy Fallon

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"According to a new study in the Journal of American Medicine, marijuana can actually help make you thinner. Using marijuana can make you thinner unless you're taking it in brownie form." -Jay Leno

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I was working in the sun all day, putting finishing touches on the new deck outside my house. My sister pulled into the driveway, greeted me, and looked over my work.

"Wow," she gushed, "you're an expert."

Feeling complimented and satisfied, but...trying not to seem egotistical, I responded... "Once you get going, it's pretty easy!"

She looked puzzled and wondering if I'd misunderstood her I asked, "What did you just say?"

She replied, "I said, your neck's burnt!"


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
The Wolf Man comes home one day from a long day at the office.

"How was work, dear?" his wife asks.

"Listen! I don't want to talk about work!" he shouts.

"Okay. Would you like to sit down and eat a nice home cooked meal?" she asks nicely.

"Listen!" he shouts again. "I'm not hungry! I don't wanna eat! All right! Is that all right with you? Can I come home from work and just do my own thing without you forcing food own my throat? Huh?"

At this moment, the wolf man started growling, and throwing things around the apartment in a mad rage. Looking out the window, his wife sees a full moon and says to herself, "I guess it's that time of the month."