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Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Good morning crew,

Does nothing last? Is nothing permanent? How can a man feel secure in his place in the universe if everything around him is ephemeral?

Today we had a new company picture taken (if you check www.pulsetv.com it might even be up already), so yesterday I went to get a haircut so I don't look like some kind of shaggy hippie on the company website.

Now, I go to this one place in particular because I know there are two girls there who know how to cut my hair the way I like it. I know this because I spent years going from place to place until I found a stylist I could actually trust around my head with a pair of scissors.

I have been going there for three or four years now, so I have even been able to coach a second girl to cut my hair correctly. But when I went there yesterday what did I discover? Both girls left. Both!

So, in keeping with my history of bad decision making I let one of the new girls attack my head with, I don't know what she was using...pruning shears or something, and she delivered a catastrophe of truly nightmarish proportions.

I look like a Picasso painting. It's just not fair.

Hair stylists should be like doctors; you should have your own and if he or she leaves you they should have to provide you with references.

Oh, and I should be able to sue for malpractice when I get a bad haircut.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"Year, (noun) A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments." --Ambrose Bierce's DEVIL'S DICTIONARY

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"Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example." --Mark Twain

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"A committee is a cul-de-sac down which ideas are lured and then quietly strangled." --Barnett Cocks

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Our first day at a resort, my wife and I decided to hit the beach. When I went back to our room to get something to drink, one of the hotel maids was making our bed. I grabbed my cooler, but not being sure of the hotel rules I stopped at the door and asked the maid, "Can we drink beer on the beach?"

"Sure," the maid replied, "but I have to finish the rest of the rooms first."


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*

My ten-year-old, under the tutelage of her grandmother, was becoming quite knowledgeable about the Bible.

Then one day she floored her grandmother by asking, "Which Virgin was the mother of Jesus: the Virgin Mary or the King James Virgin?"