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Thursday, February 20, 2014

Good morning crew,

Tax time! The wife and I are going to see my tax girl this weekend armed with a manila folder stuffed with documents, papers, forms, statements and receipts.

This will be the first time we will be filing jointly so we are going to find out if there really is a tax penalty for being married.

Consequently I may be getting divorced this year.

After that fiasco we are going to take our frustrations out at the range (because firing a pistol is always more satisfying after being stiff-armed by the government).

That will be Saturday morning. Then we have a busy schedule of social obligations to fulfill the rest of the weekend. Hopefully nothing too critical or expensive will happen, but I promise to fill you in on any exciting details next week.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"Today in New York was the finals of the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show. This year the dogs competed in a variety of categories including talent, evening gown, and swimsuit." -Jimmy Kimmel

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"Here in New York City we have so much snow that they're running out of salt. So right this minute, sanitation workers are out on the street scraping pretzels." -Dave Letterman

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"There's a new survey that found that 50 percent of doctors admit to going on Wikipedia to look up medical information. While the rest behave like professionals and use WebMD." -Jimmy Fallon

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An office technician got a call from a computer user. The user told the tech that her computer was not working. She described the problem and the tech concluded that her computer needed to be brought in and serviced.

He told her, "Unplug the power cord and bring it up here and I'll fix it for you."

About ten minutes later she showed up at his door... with the electrical cord in her right hand.


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*

This is a fool proof Best Friend Test. If you don't believe it, just try this-

Put your dog and your wife in the trunk of the car for an hour.

When you open the trunk, who is really happy to see you?