Monday, January 14, 2013

Good morning crew,

I have long considered myself a decent cook. 20 years of bachelorhood forced the skill on me and I think I have taken to it pretty well. But I learned the limit to my skill this weekend; and that limit is apparently crab cakes.

The wife and I went downtown to visit old Mason, and in order to keep us occupied in between beers we decided to experiment with something neither of us had any experience with.

So I looked up what seemed like a simple enough crab cake recipe and when we got down there we went to work. Well, I don't mind saying it was a miserable failure. Imagine a half-raw, crab-flavored hamburger patty.

But we had spent over 50 bucks on the ingredients and I wasn't about to let all that food go to waste. Although I probably should have.

As a side note, scotch is not a good cure for diarrhea.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

P.S. Who likes cheerleading? Well, you might not be a huge fan of cheerleading but everybody likes cheer leaders! Our local cheerleading squad is involved in a contest on Facebook to be featured in a film at the Cheer Super Nationals! All you have to do to help out is click on Cheer Command's logo.

Click here to vote for the Cheer Command Rockets

***
"Resolutions just set you up for failure. My resolution last year was to learn Spanish, and that only lasted about dos weekos." -Craig Ferguson

***
"What happened to the fiscal cliff? Are we on it or off it? Forget it. The debt ceiling is the brand new crisis. The fiscal cliff was just the warm-up, just for beginners, like a student film." -Dave Letterman

***
"The White House has announced that the theme for President Obama's second inauguration will be 'Faith in America's Future.' The idea is to get our minds off of America's present." -Jay Leno

***
Rushing to get to the movies, my husband and I told the kids we had to leave "right now"?at which point our teenage daughter headed for the bathroom to apply makeup. Her dad yelled for her to get in the car immediately, and headed for the garage grumbling.

On the way to the multiplex my husband glanced in the rearview mirror and caught our teen applying lipstick and blush, which produced the predictable lecture. "Look at your mom," he said. "She didn't put on any makeup just to go sit in a dark movie theater."

From the back I heard, "Yeah, but Mom doesn't need makeup."

My heart swelling with the compliment, I turned back to thank this sweet, wonderful daughter of mine just as she continued, "Nobody looks at her."


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
A teenager brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents. They are appalled by his haircut, his tattoos, his piercings.

Later, the girl's mom says, "Dear, he doesn't seem to be a very nice boy."

"Oh, please, Mom!" says the daughter. "If he wasn't nice, would he be doing 500 hours of community service?"