Thursday, February 13, 2014

Good morning crew,

Since tomorrow is Valentine's Day and practically every decent establishment is going to be packed, the wife and I are going to do our Valentine's celebration tonight.

After dropping an intimidating wad of cash on last weekend's Hofbrauhaus excursion, we decided to keep things simple and cheap (well, relatively cheap) by going to our favorite local sushi restaurant. Because nothing says romance like raw fish and seaweed.

Raw fish, seaweed and two or three bottles of hot sake.

I have been trying to condition her that when we are in a sushi restaurant I am the Samurai and she has to serve me sake before she serves herself. It hasn't quite stuck yet, but I'll give it another go tonight.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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A primer for any couple should be the book MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS. It explains that men and women are from different planets. For example: women like to verbalize their feelings on relationships. It's difficult for a man to even admit he's in a relationship.

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"Valentine's Day is weird. A nude flying baby that shoots arrows isn't a holiday. It's a horror movie." -Jimmy Kimmel

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"A new survey reported that 40 percent of people think it's a good idea to get engaged on Valentine's Day. The other 60 percent were men." -Conan O'Brien

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A woman goes into a sporting goods store to buy a rifle. "It's for my husband," she tells the clerk.

"Did he tell you what gauge to get?" asked the clerk.

"Are you kidding?" she says. "He doesn't even know that I'm going to shoot him!"


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes ---------------*

Two older, successful businessmen met at a resort. One who had recently retired was describing his life, "I get up late in the morning, have a light breakfast and then I lie down on my veranda for a few hours and relax.

In the afternoon I go inside for lunch, have a great salad, fruits and cold fish, then I spend the rest of the afternoon boating or playing golf or tennis...

When it starts to get dark I have a great dinner with the finest wines. I smoke a Cuban cigar. Then I go lie on my veranda again."

The other gentleman acknowledges that this is a life to be envied. Later he reported the conversation to his wife. She asked, "What's his wife's name?"

Her husband said, "I'm not sure, but I think it's Veranda."