Friday, November 13, 2015

Good morning crew,

Oh no! It's Friday the 13th. You know what that means? Only two days until Monday.

But if you are superstitious you might want to stay off the streets as much as possible today to avoid the bad luck notoriously associated with this innocent day.

I, myself, am not superstitious, but I'm not taking any chances. Right after work I am going to lock myself in the house with a case of beer and order a pizza.

Better safe than sorry, you know.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"Researchers have published a letter from a Harvard student in 1743 asking his parents for money. On the bright side, just this year his student loans were finally paid off." -Conan O'Brien

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"Indonesia's anti-drug chief is proposing that the country put narcotics offenders in a jail on an island surrounded by crocodiles. The plan is to send the inmates food supplies every day but they will have to survive on their own. This already sounds like a reality TV show I would totally watch." -James Corden

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"New research has found that contrary to popular belief, it could be beneficial for women to eat and drink while in labor. Though I don't think the other people in the restaurant would be too happy about it." -Seth Meyers

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During his physical, a doctor asked his patient about his daily activity level.

The man said, "Well, yesterday afternoon, I waded along the edge of a lake, drank eight beers, escaped from wild dogs in the heavy brush, jumped away from an aggressive rattlesnake, marched up and down several hills, stood in a patch of poison ivy, crawled out of quicksand and took four leaks behind big trees."

Impressed by the story, the doctor said, "You must be one hell of an outdoors man!"

"Outdoorsman nothing," replied the man, "I'm just a lousy golfer."


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
A young Jewish lad entered Notre Dame to play football. At the end of the season, he returned home. As luck would have it, he ran into his Rabbi at the airport.

The rabbi asked, "Are they trying to convert you over there at South Bend?"

The youngster said, "Of course not, Father!"