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Friday, July 31, 2015

Good morning crew,

Payday today, and I have to earmark some of the funds for the Taste of Orland Park this weekend.

That is always a pleasant way to spend an afternoon. It is small, local, with live entertainment and no admission fee, so it's hard to beat that.

Orland Park is what we like to refer to as an "upper income" community, consequently they have a pretty nice selection of restaurants, most of which are represented at the taste.

So in addition to street fair staples like sausages, barbecue ribs and giant, salty pretzels, there will be a few unusual menu items like Beef Bourguigon, Jambalaya, Eggplant Hominy with Chickpeas, and spring rolls.

There is even a microbrewer there, so when I got tired of lite beer I can mix it up with a wheat or an IPA. Plus, the Mexican restaurant is always serving margaritas.

The capper to the entire weekend will be a performance by a band called American English. They are a very popular tribute band to the Beatles. I have seen them before and they really deliver a good performance.

And the nicest part is that the fest is barely fifteen minutes from home. That really makes a difference when that last bratwurst is calling my name.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"A recent study shows that standing at work for long periods of time is bad for you, after earlier research indicated that sitting for too long at work is bad for you. So really the only thing we know is, work is bad for you." -Jimmy Fallon

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"Researchers are developing a stay-sober pill that will prevent you from getting drunk off of alcohol. It's perfect for the drinker who wants all the calories of alcohol but none of the fun." -Conan O'Brien

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"A teen couple has won over $20,000 in scholarship money for making their prom outfits. They made their prom outfits entirely from duct tape. Unfortunately, they had to spend it all on hospital bills after taking the outfits off." -Seth Meyers

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One cold night my furnace died, so I went to my parents' house. In the morning, a neighbor called to tell me that my water pipes had burst and flooded my town house and hers. I raced home and on the way got a speeding ticket.

Then the furnace repairman arrived and told me he didn't think he had the proper fuse but would check in his truck. Meanwhile, the plumber cut holes in my bathroom wall to locate the leak.

When the furnace repairman returned, he held aloft a fuse. "I had the right one after all," he said triumphantly. "This must be your lucky day."


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*

Hygiene is in the eye of the beholder, I have decided. One lunchtime I watched the woman in the sandwich shop spreading mayonnaise on my bread, and noticed part of her grubby work shirt was dragging across it. "Excuse me," I ventured, "your sleeve is in the mayo."

"No problem," she reassured me. "I need to wash it anyway."